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Product details

Paperback: 368 pages

Publisher: Grove Press; Reprint edition (March 9, 2000)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 0802136842

ISBN-13: 978-0802136848

Product Dimensions:

5.4 x 1 x 8.3 inches

Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

4.5 out of 5 stars

72 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#375,441 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Malan is the scion of a Afrikaner family, pioneers among the Dutch colonists who established an outpost at the Cape of Good Hope in South Africa, where they fought the Zulu and Xhosa armies in order to survive and then to conquer that bloody frontier. The Afrikaners then became the victims of imperial onslaught themselves, fighting a series of wars against the British Empire, drawn to South Africa by gold and other wellsprings of wealth. His ancestors became men of wealth and substance, and central to the Afrikaners' sense of themselves as ordained by God to rule that place, and to do so in the name of a Christian mission to the Dark Continent, but a deeply conservative mission preserved, expanded and enriched by any means necessary, and devoted to the oppression of black Africans, whom the Afrikaner told themselves, not without some truth, would rise up and kill them in their beds if allowed to gain power. "They spoke of themselves as bearers of the light," Rian Malan writes, "but in truth they were dark of heart, and knew it, and willed it so."Of course, the violence of the Afrikaners' predicaments was rooted in their own role as conquerors. In some ways, their view corresponded to Thomas Jefferson's assessment of slavery for the fledgling United States: "We have the wolf by the ears, and can neither safely hold him nor let him go. Justice is in one scale and self-preservation in the other." Upon such rationales are white supremacist empires constructed. Eventually, the Malan clan becomes pivotal in the creation of modern South African apartheid in 1948, which rested upon historic foundations of white domination, both by the Dutch settlers, who became, in some sense, a white African tribe--the Boers--and by the British, whom they battled as though they were a native people resisting the imperial juggernaut, successfully, in the end, even as they oppressed the black African native peoples. It is a hard story, and into these dilemmas Rian Malan was born in the suburbs of Johannesburg, and into an only somewhat liberal white South African family. But his life was not separable from the deep injustices in which be was born embedded. "I was a white man born in Africa, and all flowed from there," Malan writes.This candor is typical of this powerful memoir. As a teenager, Malan becomes a socialist opponent of apartheid, a hippie, really, and has romantic images of himself as the Just White Man, nobly working to set things aright. But he is too honest to stay in that self-congratulatory pose, and never does his narrative lapse into the politics of self-exoneration. After starting his literary career with an underground newspaper attacking apartheid with no result other than to make its staff and readers feel wonderfully clean of their own unexamined white supremacy, he becomes the crime reporter for the largest South African daily newspaper. He takes to exile in the United States for a time, running from the troubles of his homeland and from the complexities of his position of privilege, his reluctant but finally inexorable commitment to a politics of liberation for black South Africans, and the painful predicaments of his "traitor's heart."The results are a profound, eloquent, utterly candid memoir, beautifully rendered, refreshingly unpersuaded of its own purity, wearily if indefatigably devoted to democracy for all South Africans, but keenly aware of the impossible nature of this historic task and his irrelevance, for the most part, to the outcome. It will make you wince, but this is a very truthful book, and if it is a call to arms for we who believe in freedom, we who oppose white supremacy in all its manifestations--in our economies, in our social structures, in our cultures, and in our hearts--it is not a naive call to arms.I have read it twice before, once twenty years ago when it helped me attain a more honest view of myself as a white man and a recovering white supremacist like all of my compatriots, whatever their color; again when I was trying to be a good soldier in the struggle and encouraged by Malan's candor and commitment, and now I am halfway through it again and relishing his fine writing and deep historical and personal insights. I don't know how well, in the end, it holds up, but I am deeply impressed regardless. This is a book well worth reading, and it helps me not to be disillusioned by the failures of progress and democracy in South Africa and in the United States. These conundrums have been with us from the start, and understanding them better is one step in the long-haul struggle toward something better.

This is an amazing book. Painfully honest and heart-wrenching in places, but gives a unique perspective on life in South Africa during apartheid. Malan is a descendant of some of the initial creators of separation between white and black in Africa, a successful journalist, and a man tortured by the idea that he is a product of the environment that created apartheid and that, in the end, there isn't a whole lot he can do to reverse it. It is certainly one of the more readable and compelling non-fiction books that I've read. It has changed by understanding of racism - even if I already knew that we are all in some way racist, that concept gained depth and perspective through this book more than any other that I've read. I thoroughly recommend it for anyone with the courage to face up to what people do to people just because of racial, cultural or other differences.

The "troubling" aspects of Rian Malan's biography are easily described: everything in his life and in the history of his South Africa, the centuries of ever-hardening racism and violence of his "tribe" -- he is a Boer, the scion of a prominent family, whose ancestors played horrific roles in the formulation of apartheid, of absolute racial separation -- but also in the 'social anthropology' of the Zulu and other dark-skinned tribes that the colonizing whites so brutalized. In fact, the most horrifying incidences of violence Malan recounts are incidents of black violence against whites (understandable to liberals in other lands!) and, worse, of black violence against other blacks, based on ancient tribal feuds and on rival politics of resistance to white rule. Part historical study, part personal apologia, part investigative journalism, "My Traitor's Heart" is the sort of narrative that circles around itself, prefigures its own direction but then moves elsewhere, and never becomes entirely committed to a thesis; that's not a flaw, in my mind, since Malan circles around himself in equal uncertainty of his own role and his own worth. As his title suggests, this is the confession of a troubled man, whose primary trouble is that he can't find an answer to his most important question: "how to live in his own country?"The easiest summary of Malan's analysis of the racial catastrophe called South Africa, the summary that seems so terribly, terrifyingly inevitable, is straight out of Kipling: "Black is black and white is white, and never the twain shall meet!" But for Malan, the scion of apostles of apartheid, that summary is unconscionable. Loathsome. Hopeless. An answer that solves nothing. This IS a book that ends itself in a welter of despair, though there's the unconvincing rhetorical 'promise' of long-term good intentions.The "troublesome" aspects of this book are more subjective and harder to express. I don't admire the author. I don't entirely trust the author's investigations of his own conscience. Malan repeatedly expresses his own self-doubt, his own shame-faced realizations of his superficiality and posturing as a liberal leftist. Well and good, but I still don't feel comfortable with him. He wants too much that we should praise his candor and esteem his penitential embarrassment over his life choices. But who am I then, to treat him so skeptically? I've never visited South Africa. I've scarcely studied its history or anthropology. I've read a few novels, seen a few films, seen the plays of Athol Fugard performed for predominantly white audiences. How can I confirm anything Malan writes? How can I feel confident that he is depicting the society in any sort of entirety? Or is he ignoring vast significant aspects of that society, out of his own stubborn personalism? My confidence in him was sorely shaken, after I finished the book, by my discovery of his role in "denying" the severity of the AIDS epidemic in South Africa. He has since attempted to explain his position by maintaining that the international health/welfare agencies have "exaggerated" the extent of the epidemic in order to boost their fund-raising, in other words, for selfish institutional aggrandizement. That's the sort of accusatory sour-grapes that I hear altogether too often about every agency -- environmental, scientific, humanitarian -- and that serves nobody's well-being.So who is the real Malan? Despite the insistent tenor of self-revelation in this book, I can't help feeling that the author is still a poseur, a man masking himself in humility, annoyingly proud of being humble.

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